Neon White - Zero Punctuation

Neon White – Zero Punctuation

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Oh Yahtzee, you should do Diablo Immortal. It’s a bit boring and the camera zooms in too close, and it’s also the most insidious act of evil ever squeezed out of Beelze Blizzard’s black thorny anus. Sounds like you already know what you think about it, viewers. Why would I seem unhappy all week just to rephrase the established general opinion through the lens of a joke about a dick and progressively changing the title into something disrespectful. Let me tell you what, let me just list all the things I would now call: Diablo Immortal, Diablo Immoral, Diablo Impoverishing, Diablo Income Statement, Diablo In A Gadda Da Vida Babi. Now let’s move on and try to spread the much needed positivity instead. And you know what makes me positive: new indie games I haven’t heard of before, but I really love them. The Escapist has a common list of review games from which I always try to steal the juiciest carrots before the guys from 3MR sober up on Monday morning, and Neon White caught my eye when he described himself as a fast first-person shooter. And I’m growing more and more interested in fast runners, mainly because I feel that someone needs to keep an eye on these people before there is an unexpected shortage of Mountain Devs and they burn all our cities.

And after you’ve played it, yes, I guess you could call Neon White a first-person shooter because it’s a first-person shooter and you actually shoot, but enemies can’t move and have all the dynamic characterization of obstacles on a sprint track. It really is a platformer with speed puzzles in the first person, where at every level it is a challenge to find the fastest way to spray all the obligatory murders and hit the exit. The unique mechanical gameplay is that you take weapons cards that you either shoot in the usual boring way or throw to use some kind of movement unique to that gun – the gun gives a double jump, the rifle rushes into the air, the rocket launcher has a catch hook, which means that if I also let out the aroma of the shrimp cocktail from the stalk, then I would officially not need anything else in my life. And I can definitely see through the line at the core of this idea. There is something fundamentally cool, if not terribly environmentally friendly, about throwing worn-out weapons in the middle of an action scene. Like in the lobby scene in the first Matrix movie, or the guy from Overwatch who probably has more spare weapons with him than the lost property department in American high school.

Why weapons should be presented as maps is a little less clear to me; maybe if you can describe yourself as a “card fighter” then you are entitled to tax relief from the government of independent games. And the final ingredient is an element of the visual novel, (saliva). No, it’s okay, I guess. It’s good to separate the intense challenges in fast running with a little delay in hanging out with some anime characters, or more precisely, characters from web comics drawn by a freshman student who watches too much anime. I don’t hate the story, it’s just a little… a minor, I guess. You play a tense character in a suit with too many belts, expressed by the great Steve Bloom wearing his cowboy bebop hat, and he was once part of the CRIMINAL GANG, which operated more like a club of best friends on a tree, and consisted of a swamp of standard archetypes: lazy idiot friend, pretty girl, loud girl. A loud girl who shows the usual, somewhat reckless student web-comic definition of madness: she loves violence, has bulging eyes and generally behaves like a manic twelve-year-old whose head was recently trapped in a jelly dispenser.

Still, at least the plot is pretty easy to figure out. Our hero, White, named after his favorite Beatles album, is dead in purgatory, but he and his chromatic friends are invited to heaven because they are like best friends in a club on a tree that deals with crimes and they are needed to fight the invasion. demons and whoever does the best, remains in heaven as God’s personal rat. A lot of Neon White gives me the atmosphere of the Court51. Cheerful tone, visual style, grandiose themes, the way in which each individual character is a super cool killer, because Suda51 is obviously not aware that there are other jobs, only storytelling and writing have that vannime vibe that is a little out of the question. Vannime is when something non-Japanese affects the look of Japanese anime, just to save you going to the glossary, and when I looked at the developers to confirm that they are not Japanese, it turned out that the main designer was Ben Esposito, the guy who made Donut County and a few other things , but when I mostly remember because his last name would be a really good name for a spaceship. “Captain, we have confirmation that the larvae of the Andromedan plague have completely flooded the Esposito station.”

But I draw your attention. Just to repeat, I didn’t mind the anime stuff even when from time to time you can fucking physically feel his constant urge to get to an episode on the beach. In fact, I felt motivated to find all the hidden gifts on each level to unlock every bonus conversation. It is not a complex system of relationships; each character has only one gift to love. Personally, if I had been given nineteen bottles of perfume, I would have understood it as digging in my personal hygiene, but that really opened the love interest of a pretty girl, in several senses of that phrase. It’s not that I took the time to find hidden gifts and a gold star on each level just to moisten the fictional character’s insert. I did it because it was fun to work. Plus, there are bonus challenge levels that you can only get from a relationship and that meant even more fun for me. FUN. F, U, N. Provides joy or fun. Look, the gaming industry. In this age of wild Jimmy Cockthroatism, over and over again I have made it clear that I have a lot more time for a game that focuses on doing one thing well than I do for bloated overly designed spun salads that try to take care of shooters and stealth at the same time. players and single players and multiplayer players and players who just want to sit in the corner pushing ants in the nose.

The basic loop of playing Neon White is not complicated, but it is fun, cathartic and challenging, and parts of the visual novel do not interrupt it so much but give the necessary breaks to catch your breath and drink Gatorade. And the game is nicely focused on your intended experience in fast running. Maybe from time to time. I might appreciate a few more free-form levels that focus more on stylized demon shooting than following a very specific linear path to the end, but Neon White wants to be a faster puzzle than a shooter, and that’s okay with me. Could more of us be so sure of what they want. Sit in my barber chair and say “Number three buzz cut!” And I’m like “Yes sir!” Better than games that come and go. “Oh, I don’t know, make half my head short and the other half curly and paint the top green and the bottom color of your choice, so you have a sense of personal ownership of my hair.” And then I’m like, “Bitch, don’t come in here with your complete indecision and say it’s in my favor.” Don’t push half a pineapple into my gravel and call it juice cleaning. ”

#Neon #White #Punctuation